which is still one step above giving someone money. money is the ultimate in “i don’t know you well enough to confidently buy you a drinky bird” gift-giving.
On a related note, I’ve been meaning to make a t-shirt saying something along the lines of “my sense of cultural identity and self-expression was replaced by baseless commercial signifiers and all I got was this lousy t-shirt”.
They could be selling those everywhere.
The only t-shirt I’ve ever bought with anything written on it said ’01-01-00… it’s coming™’. I was discounted by 80% in 2003. I liked it because it was so pathetically outdated, trying to add mystery to an event that turned out to be just a bunch of numbers, that no one could possibly think I was trying to be cool or clever or ironic by wearing it. It was stupid before the turn of the century, and doubly stupid after it.
My favourite idea for a shirt is ‘If you think this self-referential shirt is in any way witty or clever… we have nothing in common’.
I like how perfectly antisocial it is. If you’re the sort of person who thinks shirts with writing on them are ever clever… we have nothing in common. If, on the other hand, you HATE shirts with writing on them, and you think it’s clever that by wearing this shirt I’m trying to distance myself from people who think shirts with writing on them are clever… then you just compromised your principles, and we still have nothing in common.
I’ll never make this shirt, though, because every time I see someone wearing a shirt with something self-promotingly clever written on it… I want to punch them. If only because I’ve just walked past someone wearing a clever shirt, and was hoping I wouldn’t have to see another one for the rest of the day.
It was recently shown in a study that asking an individual to “calm down” was effective on 9% of the time. “Settle down”, and “take it easy” were also studied and found to be generally ineffective also.
@David Thompsen: dude, the last sentence of your post the way i think you meant it:”If only because I’ve just walked past someone wearing a clever shirt, and was wishing i would have thought of it first.”
Oh wait, thats me.
idkrash, you are on some kind of one-man campaign for the pencil case. It is on my list of things to think about but no new making of stuff to sell is happening between now and Christmas. (New stuff will appear, but it is already made.)
Bloom – what about “my sense of cultural identity and self-expression was baseless commercial signifiers all along” – or was that just the pitch for the Transformers movie?
Benford Cruz: Um, right… I should probably have waited a day before posting that, just to get a sense of perspective.
It’s just that my frustration at ‘shirts with clever things written on them’ reached tipping point when a shirt came out saying ‘You read my t-shirt. That’s enough social interaction for one day.’
So… you obviously want to be left alone. But… you want to draw attention to yourself. You obviously want to get noticed. But… you also just want to be left alone.
Why not just… try to look nondescript? Oh wait, because you want to make a statement. Why do you want to make a statement? Because you’re insecure? But doesn’t that mean you don’t really want to be left alone? Are you telling people you just want to be left alone in the hope that they will come over and talk to you? Because that’s what it’s looking like to me.
This shirt is the apotheosis of pure unresolvable social nonsense, and yet I have seen three people wearing it already.
I will drop the subject now because I feel bad about filling Dorothy’s comment page with vitriol. I’m actually pleasant most of the time, I think. It’s just, you know… internet.
October 16, 2009
Eee. I uh, I must admit to running about a 2:1 ratio of gift shop purchases in favor of me versus other people.
I hadn’t thought of it in any critical way, but now that you point it out. I guess that puts me a few leaps short of propriety’s bounds.
October 16, 2009
Plastic asian dolls
October 16, 2009
which is still one step above giving someone money. money is the ultimate in “i don’t know you well enough to confidently buy you a drinky bird” gift-giving.
October 16, 2009
Love the T-Shirt in the background
“Cat is having a ball”
rocketbride: I’ll take money over useless crap any day ;)
October 16, 2009
I bought myself a gift-certificate once. Does that count?
October 16, 2009
Oliver: looks like yarn to me.
October 16, 2009
On a related note, I’ve been meaning to make a t-shirt saying something along the lines of “my sense of cultural identity and self-expression was replaced by baseless commercial signifiers and all I got was this lousy t-shirt”.
They could be selling those everywhere.
October 18, 2009
I would buy one, Bloom.
October 18, 2009
The only t-shirt I’ve ever bought with anything written on it said ’01-01-00… it’s coming™’. I was discounted by 80% in 2003. I liked it because it was so pathetically outdated, trying to add mystery to an event that turned out to be just a bunch of numbers, that no one could possibly think I was trying to be cool or clever or ironic by wearing it. It was stupid before the turn of the century, and doubly stupid after it.
My favourite idea for a shirt is ‘If you think this self-referential shirt is in any way witty or clever… we have nothing in common’.
I like how perfectly antisocial it is. If you’re the sort of person who thinks shirts with writing on them are ever clever… we have nothing in common. If, on the other hand, you HATE shirts with writing on them, and you think it’s clever that by wearing this shirt I’m trying to distance myself from people who think shirts with writing on them are clever… then you just compromised your principles, and we still have nothing in common.
I’ll never make this shirt, though, because every time I see someone wearing a shirt with something self-promotingly clever written on it… I want to punch them. If only because I’ve just walked past someone wearing a clever shirt, and was hoping I wouldn’t have to see another one for the rest of the day.
October 19, 2009
David – take a deep breath, and relax…
October 19, 2009
David,
How would feel about a pencil bag? They’re not just for pencils you know.
flickr.com/photos/69002273@N00/3909961542/
October 19, 2009
mr cruz,
It was recently shown in a study that asking an individual to “calm down” was effective on 9% of the time. “Settle down”, and “take it easy” were also studied and found to be generally ineffective also.
October 19, 2009
@David Thompsen: dude, the last sentence of your post the way i think you meant it:”If only because I’ve just walked past someone wearing a clever shirt, and was wishing i would have thought of it first.”
Oh wait, thats me.
October 19, 2009
Also, i bought myself a yellow brick from a gift shop in kansas…is that a good thing? or should i be glad i don’t believe in hell?
October 20, 2009
idkrash, you are on some kind of one-man campaign for the pencil case. It is on my list of things to think about but no new making of stuff to sell is happening between now and Christmas. (New stuff will appear, but it is already made.)
October 20, 2009
David – I have something in common with anyone who has compromised their principles.
October 20, 2009
Bloom – what about “my sense of cultural identity and self-expression was baseless commercial signifiers all along” – or was that just the pitch for the Transformers movie?
October 20, 2009
If you profit by compromising your principles, who was the compromise with, and do you have to share the profit?
October 20, 2009
I don’t remember a profit.
October 20, 2009
Benford Cruz: Um, right… I should probably have waited a day before posting that, just to get a sense of perspective.
It’s just that my frustration at ‘shirts with clever things written on them’ reached tipping point when a shirt came out saying ‘You read my t-shirt. That’s enough social interaction for one day.’
So… you obviously want to be left alone. But… you want to draw attention to yourself. You obviously want to get noticed. But… you also just want to be left alone.
Why not just… try to look nondescript? Oh wait, because you want to make a statement. Why do you want to make a statement? Because you’re insecure? But doesn’t that mean you don’t really want to be left alone? Are you telling people you just want to be left alone in the hope that they will come over and talk to you? Because that’s what it’s looking like to me.
This shirt is the apotheosis of pure unresolvable social nonsense, and yet I have seen three people wearing it already.
I will drop the subject now because I feel bad about filling Dorothy’s comment page with vitriol. I’m actually pleasant most of the time, I think. It’s just, you know… internet.
January 23, 2010
David: I think you’d like this one
http://store.xkcd.com/xkcd/#Witty
February 15, 2011
Have to admit – I liked the one from about ten years ago that had a camo pattern and read, “Ha! Now you can’t see me!”